If the whole world’s a stage, why do we insist on playing parts we hate?
If we can create any character we want to do, be as happy, sad, outgoing, shy, or absolutely bat-shit crazy as we wish, why the heck do we sit around taking roles that other people hand us?
This is something I’ve struggled with all my life–being what I thought everyone else wanted me to be. Depending on the individual I’d be the listener, or the clown, I’d be the sex-pot, or the sweet lover, whatever I thought other people wanted from me, that’s what I’d become. My acting career took off and I was flying high, a shell of preconceived notions, hypocrisy, and growing despair.
As multiple things happened in my life that made me look not only at myself, but those around me even closer, I started to tire of the charade. I didn’t want to hide my light anymore just so I could appease jealous friends, joke around when I didn’t feel like, or continue to give so much of myself that it literally made me feel spent. I was tired of my acting career and decided to quit.
Exit stage left.
I’m still working on always being who I want to be. I take the parts I want to play and if Jackie the agent has a problem with it, or gets worried about people’s reactions, I put on an extra coat of *ME* paint and keep going. It’s not always easy, I won’t lie, but shit if it isn’t fun :).