Okay, so that ‘risqué’ introduction to today’s post might not be exactly how it happens and of course it’s not always a significant other who might be guilty of this. What am I on about? Well lovely readers, I’m referring to the gift-zone, which I suppose is like the friend-zone but with material things.
It’s the holiday season and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with showering others with gifts. To see the look on someone’s face especially when they’re not expecting it, is truly one of those wonderful things that can bring more than a smile to the giver’s face. However, there’s a little grey area in there where gift-giving becomes something sinister. Where if you don’t give, you’re considered less of a friend, made to believe you couldn’t possibly care and at times, you’re even banished to outskirts of ‘Friendsville’.
I remember having friends in the past where I felt so bad if I couldn’t get them something, not only because I would probably feel bad anyway (working on it shhh), but because somewhere inside I knew that the sincerity of my friendship was being measured by what material things I could bring to the table. In some cases, it wasn’t enough if it was a gift, it had to be of a certain value and that price-tag was one that eventually I realised I shouldn’t have to pay.
When individuals truly care about us, it isn’t a requirement to give them material things because they’re aware of how much more we bring to the table. They’re not the ones whispering in corners about the clear lack of a box under the tree with our names attached. I’m not saying don’t give, just that if you can’t, let’s say because of money or some other strain at the time, they’ll understand. So don’t worry about those who treat your friendship as a gifts with benefits situation. Focus on the ones who see you as a gift :).
Do you find it difficult to stay out of the gift-zone? Talk to me in the comments below :).